What I Learned From My Sisters

On Friday evening Susan and I drove across the Central Valley to participate in a new couple's ministry at our church, Principe de Paz. Driving on Friday in San Jose is never fun. Driving on Friday in December is the worst. Every year I tell myself I will not leave home in December until
after Christmas. Every year I make the same mistake.

During the course of an interesting discussion on the foundations of a healthy marriage, THE topic came up. You all know what I mean... toilet seat covers and the position in which they are left by men. I always find the passion behind this issue to be particularly interesting. While I was listening to some bitter, recriminatory statements in the group, Susan leaned over and whispered in my ear, "Your sisters taught you well!"

In that brief moment, I experienced an epiphany. The reason that Susan and I never struggled over this particular issue was not my innate male sensitivity, but that my sisters taught me well. Considering the amount of emotion expended on the subject, I think I should be very grateful for the investment they made in my life.

As my mind began to wander (and my mind wanders all the time in meetings... unfortunately, even if I am the one preaching!), I began to think about other things that Janet and Joanne had taught me in life. It was amazing how fast the list began to grow.

"It is not socially correct to bite people when you disagree with them." Because I was the youngest in my family and, at least for several years, the least erudite, I developed the habit of biting my siblings to help sway the argument in my direction. Through patient explanation (and beatings) by my sisters, I learned the futility of this communication technique. It is amazing how few Christian leaders have learned this lesson. They can be vicious. My only thought is they must not have had sisters.

"Not everything that smells bad is bad." Do you remember "Home Permanents?" The smell was overpowering. I can remember searching out the remotest corner of the basement on Saturday evenings trying to avoid that pungent and probably toxic odor. It was no use. There was no escaping it. Still, when the odor cleared and I recovered consciousness, the results were amazing. My sisters went from being my sisters to rather attractive young ladies. Learning to put up with the "stinky" in order to get to the good is a great ministry lesson. It has served me well.

"Read faster dummy!" It is popularly believed in pedagogy today that negative stimulation does not work. This is not always true. After the first grade (where I was in the Bluebird, or, mental incompetent reading group) my father decided that I should read aloud from the Bible for family devotions. Unfortunately, we only read from the King James Version in those days. The combination of my reading skills and the old English produced marathon family devotion sessions. My sisters (and I distinctly remember my brother, Harlan, participating in this) provided levels of negative stimulation after we left the table that did wonders to my reading skills. I should be very thankful, and I will be, as soon as the knots on my head fully disappear!

"Solvent is required to get oil paint out of hair." I am not prepared to go into this one right now. I have a feeling it is still a sensitive subject for some people.

All in all, I am thankful for the preparation my sisters provided for me in life. If nothing else, it has apparently helped me avoid one of the most emotional marital struggles. This is not to say that Harlan did not also prepare me for life and ministry. However, "Techniques for Stretching Halloween Candy Until April" probably deserves its own Powerpoint presentation.