I have two confessions to make:
First, I did a terrible job keeping all of you up to date while we were at the Mayo Clinic in Rochester, Minnesota. I could fall back on the normal excuse that we had to pay attention to Su's rather complicated health situation. However, it seems to me that if I was REALLY interested in Su's health condition I would have kept you better informed so that you could pray with more intelligence.
So... mea culpa, mea culpa mea culpa. Please consider this the virtual equivalent of bowing my head and beating my chest.
Second, I confess that nothing I write is sent out before passing by Su's editorial pen. I mention that because of a few - very few - compliments I received while in the States. Su and I have always been a team and continue so even during this challenging time. Without her critical eye, I doubt my mangled grammar would be sufficient to communicate our particular brand of heresy.
Still, bad grammar sometimes makes for good theology.
A few days ago I re-read Hebrews 13:5. The second half of the verse states, "...be content with what you have, for he has said, "I will never leave you nor forsake you." (ESV) According to those with more skill in Greek than my own, there are five negatives in this verse which all strengthen each other. It would be similar to us saying in English, “I will never, ever, ever forsake you. Never. Ever."
I doubt this type of grammar would get past Su. She might use words like "overwrought" or "florid" to describe the writing style. However, it could be that wonderfully comforting theology requires something extra considering our linguistic limitations.
This is the same promise that was given to Jacob in Genesis 28:15. It was repeated to Israel in Deuteronomy 31:6 and 31:8. Joshua heard the same thing from God as he took over leadership from Moses. (Joshua 1:5) Even Solomon with all of his personal peccadilloes heard similar words from his God. (1 Chronicles 28:20)
I guess, if I have to choose, I vote for good theology over polished grammar. The latter helps me communicate. The former allows me to live.
Now, a few words from the "Editor-in-Chief" to help rectify my lapse in communication.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Last Wednesday we finally left Rochester, Minnesota, after I spent six weeks going through the Mayo Clinic. It was a full-time job and very, very intense. I am so grateful for many things. I cannot possibly list them all, but Woody was a ROCK for me and stayed with me, supporting me 150% the whole time. My parents provided a guest apartment for us for almost the whole stay and gave us many, many of our meals. Our home church in Rochester was a source of great input and encouragement to me. My kids have been super-supportive from near and far. Many, many people have been praying faithfully for me. Our team in Costa Rica has taken up the slack, allowing us time for healing and help. My dear friend Helen drove all the way to Rochester from Chicago to help me through one of my most difficult weekends.
The Pain Rehabilitation Clinic staff and participants were a wonderful support to me as I learned new tools to manage chronic pain and to go through the very difficult process of weaning off the strong prescribed opioids I was on for pain. (FYI, part of what we learned at that clinic was that it's best to not talk about my pain, so I'm giving you a heads up that I prefer to email and talk about other things. There is science proving that just talking about it lights up the "pain portion" of your brain, stimulating it to sense even more pain.) I will say this: my pain is probably less than when I was on pain medications - I'm on none now!- and I am much stronger, especially through their great physical therapy program. When I arrived I could only walk a few blocks. Within 4 weeks I was able to manage over 2.5 miles walking the Minnesota State Fair with other dear friends who were so helpful to me during our stay!
I stayed on at Mayo Clinic two extra weeks because I did not feel emotionally or spiritually ready to return. These past 2 1/2 years or more have taken a toll on me, and I am struggling to regain my strength in those areas. I did all I could in those extra two weeks to be built up, but it takes a long time to have my soul and spirit catch up with me, so to speak. I have some plans in place - spending more time in the Word and prayer, plugging in with more people to give input in my life, being more active, participating in a small group, finding some new Christ-centered worship music, adding in more exercise and leisure, returning to the nursing home to volunteer and keeping a regular schedule, In the midst of all this I do plan to moderate how much I do each day and not set too high expectations. Despite all the above tools and insights into helping me, I admit, I still feel in a very low place in my life at this point.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
As Su has already said, we want to thank you for you prayers and support. Observing Su going through her rather challenging life experience, I am reminded of Brennan Manning's words in his book Ruthless Trust: “… to give thanks in a state of interior desolation, to trust in the love of God in the face of marvels, cruel circumstances, obscenities, and commonplaces of life is to whisper a doxology in darkness.”
Whispering the doxology in darkness... sometimes that's all we can do.
First, I did a terrible job keeping all of you up to date while we were at the Mayo Clinic in Rochester, Minnesota. I could fall back on the normal excuse that we had to pay attention to Su's rather complicated health situation. However, it seems to me that if I was REALLY interested in Su's health condition I would have kept you better informed so that you could pray with more intelligence.
So... mea culpa, mea culpa mea culpa. Please consider this the virtual equivalent of bowing my head and beating my chest.
Second, I confess that nothing I write is sent out before passing by Su's editorial pen. I mention that because of a few - very few - compliments I received while in the States. Su and I have always been a team and continue so even during this challenging time. Without her critical eye, I doubt my mangled grammar would be sufficient to communicate our particular brand of heresy.
Still, bad grammar sometimes makes for good theology.
A few days ago I re-read Hebrews 13:5. The second half of the verse states, "...be content with what you have, for he has said, "I will never leave you nor forsake you." (ESV) According to those with more skill in Greek than my own, there are five negatives in this verse which all strengthen each other. It would be similar to us saying in English, “I will never, ever, ever forsake you. Never. Ever."
I doubt this type of grammar would get past Su. She might use words like "overwrought" or "florid" to describe the writing style. However, it could be that wonderfully comforting theology requires something extra considering our linguistic limitations.
This is the same promise that was given to Jacob in Genesis 28:15. It was repeated to Israel in Deuteronomy 31:6 and 31:8. Joshua heard the same thing from God as he took over leadership from Moses. (Joshua 1:5) Even Solomon with all of his personal peccadilloes heard similar words from his God. (1 Chronicles 28:20)
I guess, if I have to choose, I vote for good theology over polished grammar. The latter helps me communicate. The former allows me to live.
Now, a few words from the "Editor-in-Chief" to help rectify my lapse in communication.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Last Wednesday we finally left Rochester, Minnesota, after I spent six weeks going through the Mayo Clinic. It was a full-time job and very, very intense. I am so grateful for many things. I cannot possibly list them all, but Woody was a ROCK for me and stayed with me, supporting me 150% the whole time. My parents provided a guest apartment for us for almost the whole stay and gave us many, many of our meals. Our home church in Rochester was a source of great input and encouragement to me. My kids have been super-supportive from near and far. Many, many people have been praying faithfully for me. Our team in Costa Rica has taken up the slack, allowing us time for healing and help. My dear friend Helen drove all the way to Rochester from Chicago to help me through one of my most difficult weekends.
The Pain Rehabilitation Clinic staff and participants were a wonderful support to me as I learned new tools to manage chronic pain and to go through the very difficult process of weaning off the strong prescribed opioids I was on for pain. (FYI, part of what we learned at that clinic was that it's best to not talk about my pain, so I'm giving you a heads up that I prefer to email and talk about other things. There is science proving that just talking about it lights up the "pain portion" of your brain, stimulating it to sense even more pain.) I will say this: my pain is probably less than when I was on pain medications - I'm on none now!- and I am much stronger, especially through their great physical therapy program. When I arrived I could only walk a few blocks. Within 4 weeks I was able to manage over 2.5 miles walking the Minnesota State Fair with other dear friends who were so helpful to me during our stay!
I stayed on at Mayo Clinic two extra weeks because I did not feel emotionally or spiritually ready to return. These past 2 1/2 years or more have taken a toll on me, and I am struggling to regain my strength in those areas. I did all I could in those extra two weeks to be built up, but it takes a long time to have my soul and spirit catch up with me, so to speak. I have some plans in place - spending more time in the Word and prayer, plugging in with more people to give input in my life, being more active, participating in a small group, finding some new Christ-centered worship music, adding in more exercise and leisure, returning to the nursing home to volunteer and keeping a regular schedule, In the midst of all this I do plan to moderate how much I do each day and not set too high expectations. Despite all the above tools and insights into helping me, I admit, I still feel in a very low place in my life at this point.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
As Su has already said, we want to thank you for you prayers and support. Observing Su going through her rather challenging life experience, I am reminded of Brennan Manning's words in his book Ruthless Trust: “… to give thanks in a state of interior desolation, to trust in the love of God in the face of marvels, cruel circumstances, obscenities, and commonplaces of life is to whisper a doxology in darkness.”
Whispering the doxology in darkness... sometimes that's all we can do.
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