I know this will come as a surprise to many of you, but I am an extrovert.Without a doubt many of you have been convinced that I am simply a very talkative introvert. However, truth be told, I am energized by being around people.
Some of you have taken a self-descriptive psychological evaluation test called the Meyers-Briggs Type Indicator. It has been very popular in business and industry. Unfortunately, about 20 years ago it also became popular in Christian leadership circles. I say “unfortunately” because for a while it seemed like every time I met new leaders they would ask me what my “type” was. After telling them that I was an “ENTJ” some would respond with a statement like, “Tsk, tsk, I could never work on a team with you.”
On the short version of the Meyers-Briggs you can score “50 up” or “50 down” on the Extraversion (E) – Introversion (I) scale. I score “48 up” – and I still wonder which question I answered wrong.
Of course, a few people noticed my tendency towards extraversion very early in life. My father claimed I was born with a phonograph needle in my mouth. My first grade teacher (who actually receives this update) wrote on my report card, “Woody must learn there is a time to talk to his neighbors and a time to not talk with them.” Much to my daughters’ amusement, in commenting on my singing ability, my teacher also wrote, “Woody must learn that a loud voice is not necessarily a nice voice.”
I have formed the firm opinion that people - especially very public extroverts - should burn their first grade report cards before their children ever find them.
It is interesting that extroverted people often have fewer close friends than introverts. I think this may be due to the fact that extroverts want to talk to everybody at the church social while introverts actually engage in some meaningful conversations. According to Facebook I have almost 1300 “friends.” The problem is, I really do not have a clue who some of them are!
Maybe that is why my long-time, stick-with-you-through-thick-and-thin friends are so important to me. In fact, they mean more to me than I can really express.
This past week we had the privilege of having John Grant visit with us for a few days. John was on our first church-planting team in Bolivia. Together we landed in La Paz on May 10, 1978. That was so long ago that I actually had hair on top of my head, and he remembers it… vaguely. It was great to spend some time showing John what God has done in the last 15 years here in Costa Rica and throughout Latin America. It was a joy to look at God’s Word together and pray about some our personal concerns. More than anything, it was good to just be with John.
C.S. Lewis wrote, “Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: ‘What! You too? I thought I was the only one.’” Personally, I think that true friendship is also born in shared history and even adversity. There is something about getting shot at together that forges a special bond. I remember diving down some stairs with John to avoid bullets being fired during our first coup d’état in Bolivia. Friendships born under fire have a way of surviving more tranquil moments in life.
Of course, we allow true friends to exercise a certain control over our lives. This week one of my friends texted me to let me know he was on his way in for a root canal. I couldn't help it – I had to pray for him. Another wrote me an email about the health condition of his father. Again, I was privileged to pray and write him back. Since his father is also a friend, I found I needed to give him a call. Today a friend is celebrating her birthday. Once again, friendship means Su and I need to call and sing our rendition of “Happy Birthday” – hopefully in a more melodious voice than I managed in first grade.
Author and “pithy quote factory,” Robert Brault wrote, “I value the friend who for me finds time on his calendar, but I cherish the friend who for me does not consult his calendar.” It is always good to know you have more value than someone’s agenda.
All this makes me think about what it means when someone is described as a friend of God in the Scriptures. Abraham was God’s friend - he is referred to in that way by God himself (Isaiah 41:8). Most of us remember James 2:23 where we read, "Abraham believed God, and it was counted to him as righteousness—and he was called a friend of God.” (ESV)
It seems to me, whenever possible, friends spend time together. If I am going to be a friend of God I need to sit in His presence, listen to His voice and obey what He has already given me in the Scriptures. Friends care for each other’s concerns. The same is true with God. We know he cares for those things which create anxiety in our own lives. (1 Peter 5:6, 7) As His friends, we should probably take seriously what is on His heart. (Micah 6:8) Good friends enjoy each other’s company. I am not sure why we would think that would be different with God. King David wrote: “You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.” (Psalm 16:11)
Thinking about all of this, I wonder if God isn't more of a healthy introvert than He is a pathological extrovert. He seems to have the ability to go deep quickly. He doesn’t flit around the party – He looks right into our souls with genuine interest and concern. He doesn't check His calendar when we call upon His name. Because of Jesus’ life on Earth He can literally say, “You, too!” to most of our human experiences.
In 1973 I found myself walking along a sidewalk on my college campus. I had moved to Texas two weeks earlier and realized I had “landed on a different planet.” My long hair provoked unsolicited and uncomplimentary comments from my new acquaintances. As I prayed, asking God what He was trying to teach me, another university student came up behind me, put his arm around my shoulders and said, “You don’t belong here, do you Bud?” He continued on, “I don’t either. Why don’t you come home with me tonight?”
Some friends just find us… I’m glad that God found me.
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